Tuesday, February 18, 2014

A Thousand Moments

How did you feel the moment you became a parent?

I guess you'd have to define when that moment was...

Finding out I was pregnant was fantastic because I just knew...I.just.knew. And Daddy was nervous and kept telling me to wait to take the test. As if that would change the result somehow? Ha ha, I think he just didn't want me to be disappointed because I seemed so sure. But honestly, I didn't start feeling like a parent right away after becoming pregnant.

So I guess I'll go with the latter photo. Yes, it was taken mere seconds after you were born. I won't get into too many gory details (yikes) but I will say that 26 hours of labor and 5 hours of pushing and a pair of forceps later...you were finally in my arms!!

I was drugged (after all that, no shame in drugs!) and exhausted and a little traumatized, as were you. I was in awe of the fact that you were real. I just kept looking at your poor swollen little red face and thinking, "He looks exactly like my grandpa!"

Ha! Being a newborn is no picnic. 

But because you bore such a strong family resemblance right away, I knew you were mine. You slotted right into the family.

I don't know if words can adequately describe how I felt about you. It took a few hours/days for the shock and drugs to recede (it was quite a difficult birth, my sizable-noggined one!). But I knew I was in love. I knew I didn't want to put you down. I felt like I was living in a dream for those first few days when you slept so nicely. Of course, very soon you were hungry all the time and waking up to the fact that you weren't in the womb anymore and then the real fun began. 

But those first moments are priceless. A thousand tiny moments make up the whole of how I fell in love those first few hours and days. And I just remember being so amazed with how my life could go from

And all in a matter of a few (ha!) hours of labor.

And also being in awe of how I would do it all again in a heartbeat to get another sweet baby to love.

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